‘Top Model’: Fine, fresh, fierce, we got it on lock
By Contributor“America’s Next Top Model” special report
By Nadria Tucker
Welcome to Cycle 15 of “America’s Next Top Model.” Let the drama fly.
Dozens of contestants fly to Los Angeles to stand in judgment before host Tyra Banks, but only 14 will make the cut. Will Kendal Brown of Northport survive the first set of challenges?
See who can pass for a weeping willow, who needs development and who makes the Top 14, after the jump …
This season, the stakes are higher, and the models are skinnier, but one thing remains the same: Tyra. Tyra, Tyra, Tyra.
The season begins with the customary weird flashback: Tyra dressed as a schoolgirl re-enacting the surprise and wonder she feels every morning waking up and knowing that she has a room full of fake hair and corsets to call her own.
Another change this year: The winning model will receive two spreads, one in Vogue Italia and one in Beauty in Vogue. Ciao, bella! Quite a step up from shilling zit cream in Seventeen.
Once again, the pack of semi-finalists contains a hometown girl. Kendal, 23, is excited to travel to Palm Springs!
But she’s also confused about what Palm Springs is …?
This is Ann Ward. She’s weird. You can tell by the sandwich and the cat.
The drama begins. Meet Lexie Tomchek, left, and Jordan. Lexie listens, while Jordan poo-poos consumerism and fakeness and kind of everything “Top Model” represents. (The editors’ use of sepia tone denotes foreshadowing.)
Mr. and Miss Jay — Jay Manuel, right, and J. Alexander — give the girls their first assignment: Walk a runway wearing a Cynthia Rowley gown.
The girls walk in groups organized by genre. First the quirky ones; note that this group includes both Weird Ann and Crazy Jordan.
The sexy girls and the brunettes. Kendal didn’t appear to be in any of the groups, but I’m fairly sure they just stuck her in an ethnic group with the Asian girls that didn’t get any face time. 🙁
Lexie rats out Crazy Jordan’s lack of enthusiasm to the rest of the girls.
“I will cut you.”
• • •
Buy this episode or the entire Season Pass
from iTunes. [aff. links]
• • •
During the interviews, the judges ask Rhianna Atwood to pose as a cactus.
And a weeping willow.
And a tumbleweed.
Meet Emily from West Virginia. She’s the racist of this season’s bunch. And that makes her sad.
The elusive Kendal makes an appearance. She is shy but curious.
Tyra sizes up her prey: “I understand that you’re pure.”
Kendal: “Yes.”
Now, I know what you’re thinking. On a show full of stereotypes about weird girls with cats and racists from the South, Kendal must surely be a Bible-thumping celibacy nut, right? Right?
Tyra: “Tell me why being intimate with a guy grosses you out.”
Kendal: “I don’t like semen.”
Kendal: “I don’t like it on my hand.”
Kendal: “It grosses me out.”
Congratulations, Kendal. You’ve certainly made yourself memorable.
Mr. Jay manages to look past Kendal’s “confession” and declares her “stunning.” Tyra concludes that Kendal is “one of the most beautiful ‘Top Model’ girls I’ve seen in a while.”
After the interviews, the girls are invited to a party with Cynthia Rowley. Well, just 20 girls are invited. The rest are deported to … their crummy non-televised lives.
Ann is in.
Poor, weird Ann.
Kendal is in.
For the photo shoot, the girls are placed in pairs, based on similarities. In other words, their direct competitors.
Mr. Jay is impressed, but doesn’t say by whom.
The judges retire to the set of “Austin Powers” to confer before making final cuts. They decide that Kendal needs development …
But, she’s in!!
After the dust settles, 14 finalists remain. The racist and the crazy girl are out. The weird girl, the snitch and tree girl are in. The rest shall earn their nicknames in time. But for now …
The Tyra abides.
• • •
Buy this episode or the entire Season Pass
from iTunes. [aff. links]
• • •
Birmingham writer Nadria Tucker (@NadriaTucker) dabbles in magical realism and the Southern gothic tradition, but always keeps an eye toward the future of Southern fiction. Her award-winning fiction is character driven and sometimes dark, but usually plays fair. Her work has been featured in publications such as The2ndHand, Lipstick and Birmingham Magazine.
“America’s Next Top Model” airs at 7 p.m. Wednesdays on CW 21.
How did Kendal do? Who are you pulling for to win “Top Model”? Leave a comment below.
Previous: Meet Kendal Brown.
Next: Walking the runway? Tough. Walking the runway a hundred feet in the air? Dizzying. [Episode 2 — Bully for them]
Also:
- Crimson White: “Local woman to compete on ‘Top Model'”
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